I’m just so frustrated. At the school picking my daughter up. Happily chatting to one of the mums. Walk across the crossing and look up. There right in front of me is mark (that ex). Then he waved. What the problem you ask. The problem is outside my girls school on the road I live on there he is. My safe place I shouldn’t have to see him. Ever. He was meeting a friend who has his kids after school. Bullshit thing is the friend doesn’t live down here. They could’ve done drop of else where. He drives off towards my house. Then must if turned around coz he drove back past tooting and waving.
He didn’t stop to see my daughter. I’m grateful she doesn’t know his new car cause that would have set her off
He’s made zero contact made zero effort to see the kids. We agreed to be adults. I said he could still see kids. He said he still wanted to play a big role in their lives. Yes he came to my girls birthday party but nothing since and its been nearly a month. Seeing him gave me to shakes so badly. It shocked me that he had that affect on me.
So not has he let them and me down. He didn’t keep to his word. And now he’s coming into the place that is our safe place. Where anxiety doesn’t rule and I don’t have to look over my shoulder. In one foul swoop he’s taken even that away from me.
Please don’t bother with we better off without him. Don’t worry its still your safe place etc I don’t want to hear it.
Right now I’m pissed off for the first time with him. And I need that anger so I don’t start missing him more.
PS hope it bloody well hurt him to see us (I’ve lost weight and looking damn fine). That he can’t sleep. That he misses us. That it damn hurt him to see a truck in my drive that he doesn’t know. Don’t care that it sounds childish. I hope he realises that hr walked away from the best thing that ever came into his life.