Why did you get married?

I know there’s marriage for love, convenience, arranged etc. But what was you reason? Its been on my mind a lot.

I have reasons that I married my husband. Some I I have no idea how to express or comprehend. I’d never wanted marriage, believed it wouldn’t happen in my life. But meeting sailor he touched me deeply in ways I could never have imagined. Suddenly I found myself simply knowing this man was the one I wanted for life. When he proposed on two different occasions I said yes immediately both times. Getting married I was nervous but zero doubts, I know with every part of me it was right.

I remember we had been together a month or so and he’d gone out and come back with a present. It was a gift that made me almost cry. It was art pencils, and rubber. Simple you might say but the best gift. He believed and supported my art. He inspired and pushed me to explore different things. And when I doubted myself he encouraged me.

One night I had a nightmare (I have them most nights) but this night I was terrified. He woke held me so tight, kissed my head and said “I’m here, your safe I’ll protect you”.

He made me laugh to distract me from anxiety attacks. He was able to be vulnerable and open. He was as he said ” able to be weird” with me.

He is amazing with my children.

One night I was hungry (I’m not a big eater) so I sat on the bench in the kitchen while he made and feed me pancakes, laughing joking full of love.

He provides not only in the financial sense bit in all ways.

I admire him and love him so deeply.

I’ve really wondered lately with all that’s happening. Why he married me. Why he could say he doesn’t think we’ll work. He still here, but for how long I don’t know.

Last night I was really struggling so I contacted my mum to look after my children for the night. I had to put my needs above my kids and sailor. I needed to not be responsible for a day. I needed to breathe. I had all these ideas on spending time with hubby. But couldn’t face rejection. So kept quite

Then he surprised me by asking if I wanted to watch a movie with him. Instant tears and a yes from me. And its just what I needed. No words just being together.

Yesterday I’d told him I missed him. He replied he missed me to. After one I said I missed his laugh. With a sadness in his eyes he replied I do to.

Its always been the simple things that are most powerful with us. The action. I’m preparing myself for when he ends up leaving. I just hope he knows that what ever he decides. He has a wife who he touched deeply and turn my world into something amazing. That I’ll forever be grateful, a love like this comes but once.

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12 thoughts on “Why did you get married?

  1. I married my husband because he makes me laugh (even nearly 18 years later), and helps me laugh at myself. He also has always done the little things, made me a priority in his life, made me feel treasured, but never put me on a pedestal.

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  2. I married my husband because he was who I wanted to go through life with. To have children and build a family with. We have 4 children (adults now) 3 boys and a girl together. We buried one of our son’s who died shortly after he was born, Sean Patrick. I was in a very serious car accident the year we were married. Traumatic Brain Injury (coma) for 5 weeks, paralyzed on the left side. I had to do total rehabilitaion, walk, talk, stuff like that. We’ve lost everything material more than once. He drove a limo and we both worked side by side pouring coffee to feed the family. Life has never, never been easy for us. We always just hold onto each other and as we put it, “Igging it out !!” He never lets go and nor do I. 37 years we’ve been holding on. Again we were tested this past week. My dad died and he made sure I got there to say goodbye. So yeah, that’s why I married him because we wanted to live our life together. Blessings ❤ God is watching ❤

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  3. Pingback: Friday Favorites 6.17.16 | Three's a Herd

  4. I have the best marriage I could ever imagine, but it is the fifth try…yes, I was not going to give up. That is what I hope you won’t do. Actually, I had finally reached the point that it was ok and I was alright alone, but would prefer to be sharing my life (kids grown, etc.) I knew with this man that it was right and he was the one almost instantly and it works because we do all the things you mention…love, support, encourage, laugh, play, learn and even occasionally fight and/or disagree. That is ok. I hope you will listen to your gut, but also hold onto the feelings and belief you had in the beginning. It is one thing to prepare yourself in the event of trouble, but another to let your feelings allow you not to see or allow the happiness that you can have. Be true to you and to your kids and to your love. Still holding you up!

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  5. I’ve been married for almost 11 years and we’ve been making each other better for more years than that. That’s been the secret to me, honesty and growing together. I hope you two are able to continue to grow together.

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  6. For me, I had basically resigned that marriage wasn’t going to happen and there weren’t too many prospects in my immediate circle. When I met my husband I told him I was looking for someone who could be a good friend for me and be willing to go places and do things and our love grew from there.

    What really attracted me to him in the long run, however, was that he was willing to support me in my dreams and not call them stupid or silly as my parents had been saying. We’ve been married two years, so we’re still new-ish, but I couldn’t picture my life without him. (It sounds cliche, I’m sure, but it’s true)

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  7. I married him because I loved him. I would have been happy with a smaller wedding; he wanted a big one. We compromised on a medium one. For me, it’s always been about the marriage, and never about the actual wedding. It’s a few months off a year, and I’m very happy to be married to such an amazing man.

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  8. Don’t give up….they key to a successful marriage is communication…please don’t stop talking to your guy! Don’t isolate yourself – smile and tell him repeatedly how much you love him and want to spend the rest of your life with him – – if he does eventually leave you will know for sure that you truly did your best….wishing you well…. 🙂

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  9. I’ve only been married for 9 years. Hands down, best choice either of us has ever made, as outlined by the other posts above.

    The big dark secret that we all hide from each other (and from you) is that it’s not easy. There are times, especially early on, when things break, and we need to do the work to put everything to rights (often while hiding that work from the outside world). The think is, when we do the repair right, the relationship becomes stronger.

    Have you ever repaired a wooden tool with glue? If you clamp it, if you let the glue set, it actually is stronger than the wood around it. It holds the parts together more strongly, and for years you look back and remember what you saved. That does not make the repair process any easier, but it does make it worthwhile.

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