Thanks so much

For all your support. I’m reading all your comments I just can’t bring myself to reply to them all. Reading then has given me a little more strength. No changes 4 days gone now without a word. I’ve decided well for now anyways not to contact him. Give him space. Focus on preparing for Christmas. Keeping our home n gardens looking good. Showering daily even tho I haven’t the energy. I’ve pretty much not eaten since the day before he left so today’s goals to eat a little. I go through days forgetting to eat because when I’m stressed I feel physically ill and I know its not good. Im here for him and most def want us to work and home home. But I need to be real that I don’t think he will. And I don’t want to build things up in my mind or for other people n be the fool. I truly hope he knows I’m not abandoning him. I’m litery following what he said that he’s not coming back. I think I’m triggering him when I do make contact. And while its not my intent I’d rather him alive and us over then the horrible atlerive. If he calls I’ll answer. If he texts I’ll answer. If he wants to see me I’m on my way immediately. I’ll still take care of his gardens (his business) so when he’s well he’ll at least know I still cared n loved him n all that’s him. I know I have to but it feels so wrong. Why can’t he just believe in our love n me his wife to be strong for him, to support and love him

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8 thoughts on “Thanks so much

    • Thank you. Logically hear you. But emotionally I feel like a useless wife. Knowing he’s in a world of pain n dispear yet I can’t reach n he through to him. Then selfish because contacting him today and knowing I won’t get a response will break my fragile heart further 😥

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      • The hardest thing is when our hands are chained. When you see the pain and cannot do anyhting. Also I know that you want to contact him in the first place in order to let him know that you understand him. And I think it would be so important to you to know that he knows that he is understood. You are not useless. You do what you can! Your love is amazing and once he is back he will tell you, for sure!

        Liked by 1 person

  1. This is an awful situation. You are working hard to put things right in your head, good for you.
    It hasn’t been long. Don’t hang on to false hope, but don’t shut the door on things either. I think that’s what you are trying to do.
    Sending you a {{HUG}} from across the miles.

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  2. I am far away in New York but I send you Love and Hugs from the Big Apple!! Sometimes all we can do is take one day at a time or when things are really rough one hour or one moment. Of course you feel hurt. That is natural. Having a relationship take such a downward course is like getting body slammed. Don’t give up hope but at the same time do your best to keep going for your children. They depend on you. Gain your strength through your children and of course keep talking and speaking your truth. We are with you!! ❤

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