And she just added to it. I went to drop my daughter off at school, have a catch up with her teacher. First comment. Oh wow you’ve not been here for a long time. No shit Sherlock. I’m a full time student, my child goes to care when I’m in class. I have commitments I need to keep. Once again she brushed aside my daughter struggling with her learning.
I felt I should let the school know about my darling struggling with the thoughts of hurting herself. Explain I’m setting up therapy. And that she may need a hour or so off school a week to attend. This was fine. She then asked if it’s because of being in care. Four days a week she booked in for an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon. But only goes when I’m in class. More often then not she’s not there before school and picked up early. Then proceeded to tell me my child knows to much of my problems and I need to learn not to talk in front of her and stop telling her my feelings. I told her clearly that I will keep telling her when hubby and I have our group and therapy. I will tell her if I’m feeling happy, angry or sad. She pushed that I tell her what I discuss in therapy. Absolutely fucken not. We tell her that we go to learn tools to help us in our futures, that it’s ok to be open and talk about how we feel. That it’s a strength not weakness to seek help if one needs it. I don’t give her details of what’s talked about because she’s a bloody kids. I already hold guilt for what’s she’s going through. A mama should be able to protect her child from this kind of pain. I missed signs once again. And didn’t know it was so bad. Logically I know it’s not my fault and I didn’t cause it. But emotionally I feel like it is. Bow this damn emotionally uneducated teacher has pushed the blame onto me. I’m a mum and wife first. I study full-time and work to better our future. I’m a present mum, I’m emotionally available, I’m physically there. And this bitch is fucken clueless. My 9 year old is thinking of hurting herself. That’s self harm. Dangerous scarey life changing. I will fight for her. I just am blow away