Comp practice one month till the big weekend

In a month I’m competing with my son in a big cooking competition. So been getting my practice on for one of my entrys. Bailey’s cheese cake, with a centre of espresso dark chocolate cremeux, a dark chocolate mirror glaze and will be decorated with chocolate cover roasted coffee beans, Bailey’s cream, a tempered chocolate curls and gold leaf. Starting to get excited. Love glazing desserts brings a sense of satisfaction

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My husband just gave me and my son

A gift that he doesn’t know about and I wish I could tell him. With my husband in the hospital my son (14) asked why I was sticking by hubby when he’s not contact me for 2 n a half weeks. And I said to my boy because I’ve been there right where he is and I know what it takes to seek help and accept help. My son was never told I was a patient at an mental health unit. He asked me why I was there (check out my first posts for full details) I told him he didn’t need to know and that it would be hard to hear. He still wanted to know so with a heavy heart and scared of his reaction I told him I’d attempted suicide twice and self harmed. And that’s why I’m sticking by my husband. Because I fully understand where he’s at. I’m shocked because my boy took it so well asked questions. No judgements. He wasn’t surprised he just went with it. I didn’t go into all details because of his age but we talked. Its pulled us closer because he suddenly realised how far I’d come and that I’m human. So despite all the pain I’m in with my hubby I’m grateful its allowed me the oppunity to talk to my boy. So he knows if he’s struggling I’m here I’ll always be here to listen and talk. that nothings off limits. I’ve never felt this close to my son and I have my husband to thank for that. Silver lining in a horrible situation. I’ll watch my son closely in case it hits him but he’s asked to talk to gandma tomorrow once he’s had a chance to think. I so proud of him and I feel lime a weights been lifted as I’ve been scared for 4 years that someone else would tell him yet it was never the right time

Feeling pulled

This week has been challenging. Between study work, home, hubby, kids, housework I’m feeling torn. Kids are playing up, hubby is grumpy with me n I have know idea why and I’m tired. I thought semester break was this week but it’s not for two weeks. Feel like I’m running on empty trying to fit everything in. So frustrated and emotional

15 minutes

At 10.13am I received a text that there had been a cancellation at 11am for a driving lesson before sitting my full drivers licence. I’ve sat on my restricted for 12 years. Omg I’m super scared and nervous even though I know I’m a good driver. Argh  15 minutes to go please wish me luck